Monday, October 27

Life after high school

So, it's been about 5 months since I've last updated you guys and I just wanted to make a quick post to let you all know how life is going.

Well, work has been a roller coaster! I started cutting hair on the floor around the end of May and at first my haircuts sucked. So that was really overwhelming, I cried the first day. Then I started getting the hang of it and things were going really well, but now I've kind of hit a wall. At first I was making progress with my cuts per hour, and retail sales, and % of shampoos, but for about a month now my numbers have been below where they're supposed to be. My retail sales have been slacking the most, and I don't really know why or what I can do to bring them up. So that's been my biggest struggle as far as work goes, but I just had 4 consecutive days off and I go back tomorrow so hopefully a little break was all I really needed to get back on track.

On another note, I crashed a car, got my drivers license, and recently got a new car! So that's been really good. Um I have still kept in contact with my friends from school, two of whom are engaged, and two just bought an apartment together and one is now in a relationship with her abusive ex. So I'm kind of alone at the moment, I don't feel lonely exactly, but I do feel kind of empty. Not because of my friends, because we still talk on a daily basis, but I just feel empty on an intimate level. I have this longing for someone to spend time with and hug and talk on the phone with, because I'm ridiculously needy. I just haven't found the right person I suppose.

Which brings me to Bradley. I don't know if I ever updated our relationship status in the blogs, but I referred to him as B a few times and I think I left off after we broke up the first time. Well April we started talking more and I realized how much I missed him and we started dating again, and that was going really really well. I spent the night at his house and we watched netflix until 3am and he sang me songs on his guitar and I sang the right back. I loved him. I loved every second I spent with him. He went to my graduation and we took pictures and partied and it was fun. Then the next week we hung out again and I told him I couldn't stay the night and at first he was begging me to, but once I told him I had to go home he didn't fight. He drove me home and kissed me goodbye and I said "See you later. Have a good night." and he didn't say anything. Which I didn't really read into cause he was texting me later that night, but then he stopped, and I tried my hardest to figure out what his problem was. But he never talked to me again after that night...and I still miss him, but a little less ever day.

I've sort of been in a state of limbo, not really doing too much of anything. Work, home, internet. Trying to figure out who I am and why no one wants to have anything to do with me. I'm also starting up a youtube channel so if you guys want to watch me on that I should have a video out this week. The link is Anyway, I'm exhausted so I'm going to bed now, but I love you guys! :)  I promise I'll update this more!