Youtube

I've really wanted to make vlogs for a long time, and each time I watch a video on Youtube I feel even more inspired. I just get really scared to, because I know I'm not the only person to have an eating disorder in the whole world, but it feels that way. And even though the internet is seemingly infinite I'm so scared that if I do make a video and tell my story that it'll get around to someone I know. And I don't want anyone I know to know about the war in my head. I mean I want to help people, and I want them to know I'm here to talk to them if they need it, but I don't want anyone to recognize me in real life. I haven't told anyone about my ED that's in my immediate family, my mom thought it was a phase and never took it seriously. I don't want my coworkers or anyone else to find out either. I guess I feel ashamed. I still don't look like I have an eating disorder, so I feel like they would just think I'm looking for attention. I mean, I don't think my videos would get big or anything, but if I don't make a video than there's absolutely NO chance they even could go viral. I'm still insecure and I really do get scared that some day I'm going to be found out.